Reddit Challenge #30

Reddit user vanatanasov submits:

"An archaeology student is helping his lecturer smuggle fossils and artifacts from Egypt into the UK. But things go terribly wrong when one of the fossils turns out to be alive and runs off into the streets of London.

Edit: Actually, Egypt is too cliche. Make it Tibet or India or some other oriental country."


The tube train was crowded, or at least far too crowded for the task at hand. Professor Alvin Clarkson and his graduate assistant Nigel Hammersmith were doing something they knew they shouldn't: smuggling. As Nigel clutched the box of precious items in his arms, he wondered if they would make it to King's College in one piece.

It began in the rolling hills of China's Tianjin Province, where Clarkson and Hammersmith were on an archeological expedition. Of course, the Chinese didn't know that; they simply thought the two men were tourists- likely homosexuals as they assumed most British to be. The reason for Hammersmith and Clarkson's lies were because of antiquated Chinese laws which expressly forbid the removal of fossils from so-called 'sacred Chinese soil.'

However, Clarkson knew that there were more important things than chinese law at stake, specifically the evolutionary history of dogs. Recent DNA evidence discovered by American scientists indicated that Canines likely evolved in their modern form in southern China. Clarkson, being the preeminent ancient canine researcher in the world, knew he had to get to china and recover a fossil. So he took his best graduate student and did just that; lying to the authorities about their purpose, they broke off from an organized tour and found several magnificently well preserved canine fossils in the remains of an ancient village. The next day they were on a flight back to London, with their finds tucked carefully inside Chinese wine boxes.

Passing through security in China turned out to be far simpler than expected, but on the tube underneath London, Hammersmith and Clarkson began to get worried. With so many people around they were concerned for the integrity of their finds. A sudden shake, a wrong hit to the boxes and all of their work and research could be foiled, and this exact thought passed through Hammersmith's mind just moments later.

A sharp jerk on the train as it passed through a curve threw one of the passengers directly into Hammersmith. The young student dodged out of the way with cat-like precision, but he was unable to prevent the man from bumping the box. As Clarkson looked on in horror, their work fell to the floor. The box's top popped open precipitously as Hammersmith screamed, but before he could reach to grab it, the fossilized remains of the dog let out a strange sound.

It was a bark.

Clarkson's jaw dropped to the floor as he heard the bark. There were no other dogs on the train. Barely able to comprehend the nature of what he had just heard, his mind was sure his eyes had played a trick on him when he saw what happened next. The fossilized canine stood up from its cage and jumped out. The passengers screamed and gasped as the bones-dry ancient animal bounded about the train car just as it pulled into the station. as the passengers rushed to exit the train which they surely thought was haunted, the curious and playful Chinese pup followed them.

Excited, the dog followed the terrified passengers all the way out of the station and on to the streets of London. Trailed by a breathless Clarkson and Hammersmith, the dog bounded and jumped about on the streets of Kensington where they had arrived. The astonished researchers watched in horror as the fossilized dog ran across the street and right through the doors of the science museum. The two men made chase, pushing people out of the way as they tried to keep their eyes on their find.

Soon they lost track of it, but a woman's shriek gave them an idea of where to go next. As they approached Watson and Crick's original DNA model, they saw it: the dog was sitting patiently in front of the model, barking at it like a dog would to its owner when it wants to come inside.

"Looks like we found your home" Clarkson jested as he picked up the dog.

The two men shared a relieved laugh and just as Clarkson placed the happy puppy back into its box, he heard the click of handcuffs on his wrist. Looking up, he saw two policemen.

"You're under arrest for conspiracy to commit terrorism on the London tube."